Do You Conspire against Others? Blind Spot #7

Malandro Conspire Business

This is the seventh of 10 blind spots that may be sabotaging your effectiveness.

 

Blind Spot #7—Conspiring Against Others. What it Means   

Conspiring is a strong but necessary word when it comes to describing this lethal blind spot.

People who conspire against others: 1) Actively participate in negative conversations about an individual/group that is not present, 2) Silently endorse negative comments about others by not speaking up, or 3) Attack others’ credibility which raises suspicions.

The Downside of Building Silos and Camps 

Do you participate in deadly water-cooler conversations?  Do you silently endorse nasty attacks on others?  Do you influence others to agree with your negative viewpoint?

If you engage in conspiracies—actively or passively—you are on a guaranteed path of destruction. People will view you as a snake and shun you. Even your co-conspirators—the people who agree with you—will not trust you.  They know you will throw them under the bus in a moment and they’re correct.

You’ll lose it all—friends, trust, job promotions.

 

Do YOU Conspire against Others?   

Ask others to assess your behavior using the scale of 1 (rarely) to 5 (frequently).

Malandro Blind Spot 7

How do you rate?

32 to 40:    You are profoundly hurt, disappointed, and/or angry and it’s showing in your behavior.  Stop! You are self-destructing.

17 to 31:    Sometimes you’re good; sometimes you’re horrid. Do you want this reputation? Apologize and get on a constructive path.

8 to 16:       You steer clear of negative conversations.  But do you stand up for others?

Want More?

Read the book Fearless Leadership and the anti-blogs on the 10 Blind Spots.

Anti Blog

 

Dr. Loretta Malandro is the CEO of the Malandro Consulting Group (www.malandro.com) and the author of several landmark business communication books including: Fearless Leadership, Say It Right the First Time, and her new book, “Speak Up, Show Up, and Stand Out: The 9 Communication Rules You Need to Succeed”.

Do You Blame Others? Blind Spot 5

Malandro Consulting Blame Others Employee

This is the fifth of 10 blind spots that can sabotage your effectiveness.

Blind Spot #5:  Blaming People or Circumstances. What it Means   

Pointing the finger at others or at a situation is the art of deflecting the blame from yourself to others.  After all, it’s much easier to blame and make excuses than it is to take accountability.

The Downside of The Blame Game 

Do you blame external factors instead of taking accountability?

If you do, others will perceive you as untrustworthy, a pot-stirrer, divisive, a silo builder, and a time-waster. They quickly learn that you generate blame far more often than you generate solutions.

 

Do YOU Blame People or Circumstances?   

Ask others to assess you using the scale of 1 (rarely) to 5 (frequently).

Blind Spot 5 Malandro

How do you rate?

32 to 40:    You’re sabotaging yourself.  You view people as enemies or allies.  Making excuses is second-nature to you.

17 to 31:    Sometimes you take accountability and sometimes you don’t.  Others can’t count on you to be a stand-up person and own the problem all the time.

8 to 16:      Congratulations!  You are committed to taking accountability. You slide once in a while, but you quickly recover.

Want More?

Read the book Fearless Leadership and the anti-blogs on The 10 Blind Spots.

Anti Blog

Dr. Loretta Malandro is the CEO of the Malandro Consulting Group (www.malandro.com) and the author of several landmark business communication books including: Fearless Leadership, Say It Right the First Time, and her new book, “Speak Up, Show Up, and Stand Out: The 9 Communication Rules You Need to Succeed”.

Are You a Know-It-All? Blind Spot #3

Engaged Employees Malandro

This is the third of 10 blind spots that can sabotage your effectiveness.

Blind Spot #3—Having an “I Know” Attitude. What it Means

Do you have an answer for everything? Do you feel the need to defend your views? These are tip-offs that you may have an “I know” attitude.
If you have an “I know” attitude it means that you think you have all the answers. You dismiss others’ input and you have the need to be right.

The Downside of Having an “I Know” Attitude

Is your need to be right much stronger than your need to be effective?
If this is the case, others will label you as: a tyrant, obnoxious, or a bully just to name a few. People will avoid you at all costs, feel exhausted just being around you, and walk away feeling diminished and inadequate.

 

Do YOU Have an “I Know” Attitude?

Ask others to rate you on the following items using the scale of 1 (rarely) to 5 (frequently). Resist your knee-jerk reaction to skip this part because you already know what others will say!

engaged employees

How do you rate?

32 to 40:    You’re in the danger zone. You come across as needing to be right about everything.

17 to 31:    You irritate others. Not all the time, but still too much of the time.

8 to 16:       You come across as flexible and open to other’s viewpoints. Improve the little things.

Want More?

Read the book Fearless Leadership and the anti-blogs on The 10 Blind Spots.

Anti Blog

 

Dr. Loretta Malandro is the CEO of the Malandro Consulting Group (www.malandro.com) and the author of several landmark business communication books including: Fearless Leadership, Say It Right the First Time, and her new book, “Speak Up, Show Up, and Stand Out: The 9 Communication Rules You Need to Succeed”.

Are You Insensitive? Blind Spot #2

Blind Spot 2 Malandro Consulting

(Donald Sterling former LA Clippers owner)

This is the second of 10 blind spots that can sabotage your effectiveness.

Blind Spot #2—Being Insensitive to Your Impact on Others.  What It Means.   

Do you miss the verbal and nonverbal cues of others?  If you do, you may have a low threshold for recognizing when your own words and behaviors have a less-than-desirable impact.

If you have this second blind spot—being insensitive to your impact on others—it means one of two things:  1) You lack awareness about how your behavior affects others, or 2) You lack the skills to know how to change your behavior to have a positive impact.

The Downside of Missing or Ignoring Cues 

Are you shocked by how people react to things you say or do?  If you are, you may be insensitive to your impact on others.  Although your intention is not to provoke a negative reaction in people, your behavior sends a different message.

If you are insensitive to others, it’s likely that you do not recognize how your words or actions make people feel.  You will miss important cues and you will leave people feeling irritated, resentful, disrespected, angry, or hurt.

 

Are YOU Insensitive to Your Impact on Others?   

Ask others to assess your behavior using the scale of 1 (rarely) to 5 (frequently).

 

blind spots

 

How do you rate?

32 to 40:    Warning—your insensitivity is highly insensitive. You miss even the most basic cues from others.  Read this several times.

17 to 31:    You are basically a sensitive person with insensitive behaviors.  Close the gap.

8 to 16:       You pick up the cues of others and respond appropriately.   Keep refining your skills.

Want More?

Read the book Fearless Leadership and the anti-blogs on The 10 Blind Spots.

Anti Blog

The 9 Communication Rules You Need to Succeed

From the new book Speak Up, Show Up, and Stand Out 

Is your communication sabotaging your effectiveness? 

Welcome to our crowded world.  Today instant global communication—where we prize speed over effectiveness—is contributing to massive misunderstandings and conflict.

Everyone is distracted. Chances are that your messages—whether electronic or face-to-face—are being undervalued, misunderstood, or flat-out ignored.

If you don’t know how to get your message across effectively, or how to handle the negativity that is  hurled at you via emails, text messages, and online posts, you don’t stand a chance.

What price are you paying for ineffective communicate? 

  • Stress at work and at home
  • Feeling as if your job is never done
  • Frustrated that you are being misinterpreted
  • Spending too much time dealing with constant misunderstandings

Enter the 9 Communication Rules

More than ever before we need communication guidelines to help us navigate sticky situations and resolve difficult conversations.

These aren’t your standard rules.  They are value-based guidelines that tell people who you are and what you will and will not stand for.

Speak Up

 

The 9 communication rules will set you apart: You will stand out. 

Apply them each time you communicate (consistency is key).  You will:

  • Capture the attention of others
  • Create a strong presence
  • Quickly resolve misunderstandings and conflict
  • Be viewed as an influencer or leader regardless of your title or position.

Anti Blog

 

Dr. Loretta Malandro is the CEO of the Malandro Consulting Group (www.malandro.com) and the author of several landmark business communication books including: Fearless Leadership, Say It Right the First Time, and her new book, “Speak Up, Show Up, and Stand Out: The 9 Communication Rules You Need to Succeed”.

Do You Feel Pressure to Immediately Respond to Electronic Messages?


From the author of Speak Up, Show Up, and Stand Out & Fearless Leadership

 

 

 

 

 

Pressure to Respond

With the avalanche of emails, texts, IMs, you name it, most people feel the constant pressure to respond instantly. And act on this impulse.

Take the following quiz to determine if you are an instant-responder.

pressure slide

 Instant Response

An instant response is not always your best response.  You may say the wrong thing, provide inaccurate information, create a misunderstanding, or set off a volatile email exchange. Take the pressure off yourself to respond instantly by asking:

  1. Is it necessary to respond?  If your answer is yes, reply with a buy-time message such as “I will respond to your message no later than (time/day/date).
  2. Is it urgent to respond?  If yes, respond.
  3. Is my response effective?  Take the time to reread your message before you send it. Think about the voice mail you are about to leave. Are you about to say something you will regret?

Anti Blog

Dr. Loretta Malandro is the CEO of the Malandro Consulting Group (www.malandro.com) and the author of several landmark business communication books including: Fearless Leadership, Say It Right the First Time, and her new book, “Speak Up, Show Up, and Stand Out: The 9 Communication Rules You Need to Succeed”.